Paradox Beauty
by romanov16
Summary: On Earth, she is considered a beauty, a "total knockout" as earthens would put it. But Starfire has a hard time wrapping her head around that. It's so different from what she grew up as on Tamaran. So different from what she knows. Fortunately, someone has always know it, and helps her see it to.


She had gained a reputation for beauty, and (which is often another thing) was _beautiful_ ~Charles Dickins

* * *

Thinking back on it, in the months after it happen, she realized that she should have noticed it far sooner than she had. She should have noticed that when the heads of Jump city's men turned to look at her, the awe in their faces wasn't entirely due to the fact that she was flying, or lifting things three times her size.

She should have noticed that faces of Jump city's women held one of two emotions -hero worship, or envy.

She was not stupid. Nor was she ignorant. She should have noticed. But she didn't. For months she didn't, not until long after the building on Titans Tower was completed.

The whispers were what clued her in.

Ever since she arrived on earth, she has been accused of two things. Of being a beauty. And of being a _proud_ beauty.

Both accusations had taken her aback. Beauty? She was a beauty? Since when?

(She would never forget the looks on her friends' faces when she asked them that.)

(Robin in particular.)

"Star...your kidding, right?" he asked her, almost incredulously.

But she wasn't. Truly she wasn't. Back on Tamaran, she had been considered only mildly pretty, at best. Average. Comparable to a earthen...what was the term? Mall-girl? With her gangly height, to-long legs, and (worse of all) her plain red hair that came perilously close to a commoners' shade of auburn.

She had never been, and would never be, what Tamaraneans considered a ideal beauty.

Her sister fulfilled that role. Golden skinned and dark haired, Blackfire's exotic looks had earned her the highest of praised from her earliest childhood. Beauty Incarnated, people had called her, a Lady of True Allure. They had claimed that her face could launch a million starships.

(It all had gone straight to her sister head, to Starfire's way of thinking. But that was a different story.)

Compared to that she had merely been Kori, the sweet-tempered middle child, the spare princess. The one who minded her brother, tended her garden, and advised her parents. And whom, after her parents deaths, the people could always trust to steadfastly voice their grievances before her sister neglectful court (not that Blackfire ever listened...and not that it hadn't cost her dearly.)

Kind Kori, they had called her. Good Kori. Honest Kori. Never Beautiful Kori.

That was the truth, but when she tried to tell her friends that (while leaving out a few details)...they didn't believe her. She could see it in their eyes. They _couldn't_ believe her.

"C'mon now Star, your pullin' our legs," Cyborg said, in a forcibly lighthearted tone, while Beast Boy nodded in ardent agreement. "How could anyone look at ya not think your gorgeous little lady?"

And while she said nothing, the way Raven arched a sardonic eyebrow said so much. And Robin...Robin just looked at her, his face drawn in a way that stated that he didn't understand that on her homeworld, a boy like him wouldn't even look her way. No one had.

It was hardly a pleasant experience, and having quickly grown upset with it, she retracted to the roof, and sunk down in a fit of frustrated tears. (Was that not ridiculous? She had to be the only female in the galaxy who cried because of people thinking that she was beautiful...X'hal _certainly_ remembered all the times when she had cried for the opposite reason -when she was most jealous of her sister, and could no longer hide it.)

But still...how in X'hal name could the others think that she would _lie_ about such a thing? How?

How long she stayed up their she didn't know...but the sun was setting when Robin came up and sat down beside her.

For a moment...they said nothing (this had become something of a habit of theirs, ever since her sister's...visit.)

"Star...we're sorry," he said after a moment. "All of us. It's not that we don't believe you...it just...it's hard to believe..."

"Why Robin?" she retorted, with more bite than she normally possessed (and due to the way Robin jumped, she could tell it surprised him). She hugged her knees tighter, struggling to contain herself. " _Why_ is it so hard to believe?"

Swallowing hard, her inky haired friend did his best to explain; which meant that it turned in to a...ah... _train wreak_ , she believed the earthen expression went.

"You just - I mean- you never," he fumbled, while his hand tugged at his cap. "...you never acted like...you always seemed to know how people looked at you. You're always...brushing your hair, or washing up, or buying new clothes-"

She had whirled her face around to look at him at that. "That's just my way Robin. I _like_ to take care of myself."

And she did, so in that sense, maybe she _was_ proud. But her pride was not related to her looks. It was related to the people she _saw_ in them, everytime she glanced in the mirror. In the curve of her face, there was her grandmother. In the length of her neck, was her Aunt Pri. Her legs were a generous hint to her father's height, while her eye-shape resembled her brother's, especially in the way they crinkled at the corners when she laughed.

And her smile...the one thing that both Earth _and_ Tamaran had considered equally beautiful...that was her mother, entirely her mother. One hundred percent her beautiful, gentle, eternally graceful mother.

Her features were the only heirlooms she had of her family. So of _course_ she took good care of them. It was the only mirror she had of home.

But she couldn't explained that to Robin. She was sure he would understand...but she didn't know the words.

But that didn't stop her from trying. And some where in between crying and explaining, Robin's face went from baffled, to shocked...to impossibly grave, and sad.

"Star..." he said quietly. "We didn't know..."

"Of course you didn't," she returned in an equally hushed tone, shaking her head. She wiped her eyes. " _I_ didn't even know..."

They were silence then, for a few more minutes, before Robin let out a sudden snort, making her turn to see an ironic smile playing on his lips.

"I'm not laughing at you Star," he told her hurriedly, spying her hurt expression. "It just...it's crazy."

Her brow furrowed. "What's crazy?"

And without thinking he let it slip, and came perilously close to saying what, between them, always remained _unsaid_.

"Crazy to think an entire planet couldn't see what we do."

And before that sentence was even half-way done, she was lunging across the space between them, and forcing the air from Robin's lungs in a bone crushing hug; her head tucked beneath his chin. Almost instinctively, he was hugging her back, one arm wrapping around her waist, while his free hand reached up, and smoothed her wild hair.

For the first time, she knew beyond doubt that she was beautiful.

* * *

Reviews make me happy, so tell me what you thought and i'll update sooner.

Starfire has always been represented as, but human standards, a knockout. But how aware she is of this vary from universe to universe. In the Teen Titan universe, she doesn't seem to know, given how unsure this it...and I got to thinking, maybe by Tamaranean standards, Starfire isn't considered so beautiful. That's one heck of a paradox to explore. (Plus, can you imainge the Titans faces (especially Robins) when they realize Starfire doesn't know she's gorgeous?)


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